the caged bird sings.

written, designed, and edited by Bee Butler

Two Pairs of Shorts.

Bee ButlerComment

My friend Carly (formerly Carlovely, for those of you who are Tumblr fanatics like me) posted this photo today, with the following caption:

this is a photo i took today of two pairs of shorts, both mossimo brand from the juniors’ section at target. i bought the denim pair, a size 0, at the beginning of this summer. the black pair are a size 4. let me repeat that, the LARGER pair pictured here are a size 0 whereas the SMALLER pair are a size 4. same brand. same season. THIS is why women have body issues.

I love Carly, and she has dropped a ton of weight in recent years, so she's fully aware of the utter bullshit that is women's pants sizing. I was legitimately furious at this picture, because WHY IS IT SO DAMN HARD TO JUST MAKE UNIFORM SIZING FOR PANTS, DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN.

A bunch of people jumped on my ass when I shared the picture on Facebook, because beauty standards and it shouldn't matter and blah blah blah whatever I'm not in the mood to read those comments today, thanks.

 This is why it matters to me, and to millions of others.

When you've struggled with an eating disorder, the size of your pants can be incredibly troubling. Going from a size five to a size sixteen can make you feel like you're going to die. It's crazy, but that's what fuels anorexia and bulimia; the crazy idea that your value is inherently determined by your size.

While I know that my worth does not come from a pair of shorts, my history with eating disorders makes it impossible not to see the connection there. A size sixteen is not the same or smaller than a size eight, and thus, my pants (or the pants in the picture, or any pants anywhere) should not reflect the idea that they are. Women's clothing is sized in an absurd, eating-disorder-fueling, beauty-standard-enforcing manner, and that is INFURIATING to me and so many others who just want to buy some damn fabric to cover our asses. Mossimo and the hundreds of thousands of other brands who size their clothing in such a dishonest and crazy manner need to be subjugated to criticism and consequences so that they can see the error of their ways and fix the problem in their sizing, as well as in their thinking.

The end. Full stop.



If you cannot wrap your head around that, then please do not ever talk to me about food, or pants, or clothing, or beauty standards, or weight, or actually at all, ever. Just shut up. Because this shit nearly killed me two years ago, and I'm still too close to it to be objective or give a rat's ass about your completely wrong and invalid opinion. Bye.


For those of you who get it and are mad as hell at the struggle and BS that comes along with it, know this: You are beautiful, and Target and Mossimo and everyone else can suck it. They are wrong, and your body is right, and we will keep fighting this until something changes, and it sure won't be our minds.


Until pants sizes are normal,